getting it off my chest...

so, i rarely complain or whine about the not-so-great/tough days, but i'm thinking that i just need to get this out so that i can move on.
i spent the entire past week in nashville, NOT focusing on calories or weight, and allowing myself to try and eat the foods i was really craving, versus the foods i felt were safest or healthiest.
and it felt great!
i even stopped myself from freaking out when i felt like my clothes were fitting a little snugger. i was okay with it all...until today. my body image has been shot today. and to make matters worse, i had a dietitian appointment. i am always so much more aware of my body and food after my appointments with her. i've done really well with not letting myself go back and look at pictures of myself from when i was sick but i found myself milling through countless pictures from that period. even my pictures from college and grad school, when i was sick but not super thin, bothered me. i guess i just have those days when i miss that person. i know that the person i am today is much healthier and happier, but from time to time i just feel, lost underneath my skin.
anyway, i just needed to get that off my chest.
other than that, i had my first a&p class this morning. he asked everyone when they took a&p 1....most people said the previous semester, 3 or 4 said 2008, and i said 2004. i felt so old, haha. he basically told me that i'd have to study even harder because the material wouldn't be fresh and i'd have to really stay on top of things so that i didn't get lost. i'll show him. i'm bound and determined to make an A in that class. it may have been a while since i last took a science course, but i am a quick learner and i will be on top of my work all semester. not going to lie, it will be a challenge. i have a lot of catching up to do, but i can do it.
the worst part about summer school? all early morning classes. ick. i'm so not used to waking up that early, so it has been a bit of an adjustment. other than that, i'm loving school so far. ask me in a month or two and i might be singing a different tune but as of now, i'm optimistic.
well, this was just a little vent/update. i'll write more tomorrow :)
LB